Why am I excited to turn 35?

As I turn another chapter in the page of the tome that is my life, I am reminded of a conversation that I overheard many years ago. I was a much younger lad at the ripe old age of, oh let's say, 23. My very good friend, and roommate at the time, and I were sitting in our local watering hole having a few pints before heading out for a night of bacheloring. As we're sitting there, we overhear an older gentleman, in his mid-30's, having a conversation with a young lady. He is clearly trying to make a positive impression on her, as is the want of most men in that situation. Now, we did not hear the entire details of the conversation, but there was one line that jumped out at us both like a bear claw. And I don't mean the tasty, fruit-filled breakfast treat. He said the immortal words, "I'm 35...I'm just a pup."

"Oh, really," we mutually thought. "35 years old and he's thinks he's a PUP. A young maverick just heading out into the world. Ha! Ha! Don't make me laugh. My god, you really should have your shit together by the time you hit 35," thought the brash, and impudent 23 year-olds.

Ooohhhhh, brother. If I had known then...

Now, granted, neither myself, nor my old friend are in what I would call bad shape. He is married, with children, and living a very admirable and respectable life. I, am in a wonderful relationship and I'm very far removed from slinking around in bars trying to snag the first unsuspecting, drunken, nymph that gets entangled in my web of bachelorific charms. (Yes, bachelor is now a root word) However, I will also have to admit that neither of us feel that we've accomplished everything that we should have accomplished by this stage in our lives. And speaking for myself only, I can definitely say that I am a far cry from having my shit together. Oh no, it is very much apart, and cracked and dry. It's not that nice, smooth shit that...(Well you get the idea)

Without getting into too many details, (this is a blog not a diary for god's sake) I can say that a lot of my previous decisions have caught up with me a little bit. But just to give you a little idea: You can't eat whatever the hell you want for years without it eventually sticking. (I'm currently rocking 235 pounds. But I'm like 6'7" so it doesn't show as much) You can't keep quitting jobs whenever you feel like it and expect to have money saved up. And lastly, you can't run from your student loans. (At least not without a serious, high stakes plan involving a faked death)

But here's the silver lining, (young readers, take note) I've read in the classic self-help book, "Think and Grow Rich," by Napoleon Hill, that ages 35-50 are the most productive years of your life. What's that you say? How can that be? Tune in next week.

Just kidding. I'm not a big fan of cliff hangers. Here's how it works. At the age of 35, I've actually gotten tired of the bullshit. (I know. I'm just as shocked as you are) Sure, for some people it happens sooner. For others, later. For others still, never. But I think, on average, it happens around now. You just hit that age when you get tired of it.

I've gotten tired of heading out to the bars to try and, "score chicks." I've gotten tired of being in a crappy job that I didn't want to begin with, but stuck with it because I knew that once I became a rich and famous actor, that I could tell them to go fuck themselves. I've gotten tired of living my life on the run. Going underground and staying off the grid. I've gotten tired of not owning anything. (I don't even think I'm wearing my own socks right now)

So now that I'm tired of this old way of living, I'm now fully prepared to accept a new way of looking at the world. For starters, I am not giving up my desire to be a successful, full time actor. But I've realized that there are smarter ways to go about it. I've realized that there are other ways to make money than just working the bullshit jobs. I've realized that there are situations that will support my goals, not suffocate them. I've realized that I need to face my problems because running from them only makes them worse.

But the most important thing that I've realized is this: Everybody is hustling and the hustle never ends. When I say hustle, I mean like in sports. Constantly moving, constantly working, constantly busting your ass and doing things you may not want to do in service of the greater goal. And everybody does it. I mean EVERYBODY. At least, everybody who wants to have any success at anything, ever. Donald Trump, one of the richest men on the planet, is hustling to sell yet another book. Denzel Washington, one of the most successful actors out there, is still hustling to get people to see his new movie. And still hustling to get more work. My admirable, married friend, is doing all kinds of hustles to make his situation work. (I believe one of his jobs is an ordained minister)

For years, I thought that I, for some crazy reason, was above all of this. That somehow, all I had to do was show up. Then people would immediately fall for my charms and doors would automatically open for me. (Despite what you may have heard me say in the past, I have a huge ego)

Now I'm beginning to understand it all. I realize that I do have charm, and intelligence, and that doors will open up for me. But the big lesson here is that there is a lot more to it. A LOT more. A WHOLE LOT more. We all have to make sacrifices. We all have to work, in some way, shape, or form, in order to achieve that higher level. It's a little thing called being human. And I've learned that it's not all that bad to be human. Especially since I've also learned that I'm not the only one.

And the beauty of it is, starting November 4 (gifts welcome), I've got the next 15-20 years to really take advantage of this new found knowledge.